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There's something about men who identify themselves and are identified by others as "nice guys" — as if that in itself is a defining personality — that's always set off my fight or flight instinct. I wasn't sure why until one day, the discourse around "incels," incel cultureand all the men on the internet who believe they're entitled to women's bodies as payment for being "nice guys," made it click.

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H as your sex life gone stale? Between kids, work, the economy and other pressures, steamy sex may seem like a fantasy.

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Are you ready to turn up the heat again? These tips will help get you in the mood, both physically and mentally Sweaty bodies, tangled sheets, moaning… It sounds X-rated, but it could be real life. Do most guys let a large belly or back hair get in the way of a good time?

Well, follow his lead. Make a Date Scheduling sex might sound too controlling to be much fun, sex nice sometimes planning is in order. You book time in your calendar to work out and run errands — why not do the same to prioritize sex? Hutcherson says. Reconnecting with your partner as a lover — not roommates or parents — reminds you why you were attracted to him in the first place.

So kick it up a notch by trading racy texts or leaving a sultry voic on his cell. Reality is, men are turned on by you. Lube Up The right lubricant can make so-so sex great. There are several types of lube to try, including water- and silicone-based, so experiment to see what works best for you.

Get Squeaky Clean Use mouthwash and baby wipes. Keeping everything fresh is just good manners, right? But guess what? It also helps open up those very small blood vessels down there. You can get a hefty dose of fish oil by eating salmon, mackerel, lake trout, sardines or herring twice a week, but it may be easier to take supplements.

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Trade Pain for Pleasure Sex should feel amazing. It may be a simple matter of changing positions or adding lubricant.

But it could also be a yeast infectionan undiagnosed STDendometriosispainful bladder syndrome, vulvodynia or even cancer. You can find one through www.

Do nice guys have more sex? surprising attributes lead to luck in bed

Medication Can Hurt Your Libido Some medications can blunt your sex driveincluding antidepressantsblood pressure medications, even birth control pills. You might be able to take a lower dose or switch to a different drug. Touch yourself to bump up the heat, so you can have more — and better — orgasms, she says.

The reward? A bone-shivering orgasm.

So stock it with sexy images to get your motor revved. Still missing that spark? Create your own porn by describing a favorite fantasy in a diary or post it anonymously on a blog. Simply clear out the kid toys, put away the work stuff and add small touches like candles or flowers. Get Some Comic Relief Another thing that happens only in movies: sex without gaffes.

The only thing you can do — after checking for broken bones — is to laugh and roll with it.

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Get a Handle on Vascular Conditions Some health problems affect your sex life. Blood flow. So anything that impedes the rush of blood to your nether regions can substantially curb your enthusiasm. See your doctor for help. So how do you do Kegels?

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Just squeeze the pelvic floor muscles these are the ones that control urination for several seconds and release and relax the muscles for several seconds. Do several sets of 20 to 30 reps per set daily, she says. Romanzi says. Take a Pilates Class Why Pilates and not another type of exercise?

Working your transverse abdominals will strengthen your pelvic floor muscles too, similar to what Kegels accomplish.

Why does sex feel good?

How Sexually Adventurous Are You? Would you, could you, do it in a park? How about in a car? Take our quiz to find out just how sexually adventurous you are. Health Topics.

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Health Tools. Sexual Health. By Norine Dworkin-McDaniel. Last Updated: November 17,